When We Didn't Get Along
by zombieshmirtz
Summary: Perryshmirtz. A collection of mini moments in time between an insane inventor and his semi-aquatic nemesis. Halloween update!
1. Chapter One

**Title:** When We Didn't Get Along  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A collection of moments in time between an insane inventor and his semi-aquatic nemesis.  
><strong>PairingWarnings:** Perryshmirtz! Mostly friendship, but with hints at more because I couldn't resist. A few swear words and innuendos.

* * *

><p><strong>When We Didn't Get Along<strong>

* * *

><p><strong><span>Beginning<span>**

He peered around the mailbox, pulling his hat over his eyes as he scrutinized the lanky man, with coco brown hair and a pristine lab coat. Dr Heinz Doofenshmirtz looked more like a pharmacist than an evil genius. His general appearance made him seem ditzy and uncoordinated. Perry smirked to himself, and proceeded to follow him home. He'd be promoted in _no_ time.

**Routine**

The same thing happened, without fail, every single day. He would build some crazy invention, Perry would destroy it, then Doofenshmirtz would be left to clean up whatever mess had been left behind. But today was different, and as he paced the floor, his latest machine untouched and his trap still intact, the doctor felt a pang of emptiness pierce his heart. Where was Perry?

**Mishap**

Doofenshmirtz could act like he was a force to truly be reckoned with when he really wanted to, and sometimes Perry would even feel an odd rush of fear. But then Doofenshmirtz would somehow manage to set his own hair alight, and the moment would diminish right there.

**Talent**

The trap was easy enough to escape from, but the sheer sight of Doofenshmirtz expressing his latest scheme through a musical number was enough to keep Perry glued firmly to his chair. How many of the other agents had a nemesis who could choreograph like Heinz? None, that's how many.

**Weakness**

Doofenshmirtz could _not_ believe his eyes. He stared down at the platypus clinging to the leg of his trousers, his hat askew. He let out a small whimper, cowering away from the violent rumbles from overhead. Who knew that Perry was terrified of storms?

**Sleepless**

The clock ticked through the early hours of the morning and the sun began to rise over the city of Danville. Doofenshmirtz tossed and turned, groaning when the alarm sounded. The night had been a restless one, plagued by thoughts of eternal failure and that stupid secret agent.

**Childhood**

Perry watched Doofenshmirtz pace back and forth as he spiralled off into yet another emotionally scarring tale from his past. His eyes fell to his watch and he wondered how long this crazy story would go on for. They seemed to get longer and even more insane every single day.

**Hat**

"Is that a new hat, Perry the Platypus? It's very slimming! It looks good on you!"

**Jealousy**

Perry saluted Major Monogram and headed for the exit, completely buzzed for another battle with his nemesis. Yes, his nemesis. And he hoped Peter the Panda knew that if he ever tried to take Doofenshmirtz away from him again, he's have a bust lip and a cracked nose to match his black eyes.

**Regret**

It still made his stomach squirm with guilt whenever he thought about what he did to Perry that day, even if it only was a scheme. Doofenshmirtz would never admit it out loud, but nobody could ever replace his semi-aquatic nemesis. Not even a panda from Seattle.


	2. Chapter Two

**Title:** When We Didn't Get Along  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A collection of moments in time between an insane inventor and his semi-aquatic nemesis.  
><strong>PairingWarnings:** Perryshmirtz! Mostly friendship, but with slight hints at more because I couldn't resist. A few swear words and innuendos.

* * *

><p><strong>When We Didn't Get Along<strong>

* * *

><p><span><strong>Communication<strong>

"You aren't very chatty, are you, Perry the Platypus?"

Perry rolled his eyes. Frankly, it was lucky for Doofenshmirtz that he _couldn't_ speak.

**Language**

Whenever Doofenshmirtz got really mad, Perry picked up on his tendency to rant in German. After a quick internet search and a library book or two later, Perry was left wondering if Doofenshmirtz ever kissed his mother with such a potty mouth.

**Curse**

As far as Doofenshmirtz was concerned, the day wasn't complete until his home was destroyed or he was flying through the air, cursing that damned platypus.

**Ramble**

It slowed down the entire daily process, but Perry sort of enjoyed watching his nemesis pace around, half talking to himself.

**Tired**

Doofenshmirtz sat on the sofa, stunned. On his lap lay Perry, curled up into a tight ball, fast asleep. The doctor sighed heavily and patted his nemesis briefly on the head, wondering when he became so soft.

**Lost**

Perry looked back up at the purple building, a lump forming in his throat. The heavy rain soaked his fur, mingling with the sudden flood of tears that ran down his cheeks. As much as it burned to admit, he couldn't stand the thought of a life without his sworn enemy.

**Endearment**

Doofenshmirtz counted seven times that he got away with it, each time being a separate occasion. But he learned the eighth time around that calling Perry '_Liebling_' in passing conversation would just earn him a few cracked ribs. Still, he supposed it was funny while it lasted.

**Trap**

Occasionally, he didn't even build anything to threaten the Tri-State Area and Perry would still show up. Doofenshmirtz liked to capture him anyway, for entertainment value.

**Date**

Whenever Doofenshmirtz managed to find a girl that showed an interest in him, Perry found that he was constantly on edge. After all, who could possibly like such an eccentric and evil man? With his stupid accent and his damn awkwardness. Not Perry, that's for sure.

**Research**

Doofenshmirtz flipped through the pages of a hardback book, an eyebrow raised in confusion. After spending too much time at the library, he had finally found the reading material he had been trying to chase up. He closed Fun Facts about the Platypus and pushed it beneath the sofa, feeling oddly embarrassed. Maybe he had gotten just a little too personal whilst trying to find out more about Perry.


	3. Chapter Three

**Title:** When We Didn't Get Along  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A collection of moments, thoughts and feelings between an insane inventor and his nemesis.  
><strong>PairingWarnings:** Perryshmirtz! Mostly friendship, but with slight hints at more because I couldn't resist. A few swear words and innuendos.

* * *

><p><strong>When We Didn't Get Along<strong>

* * *

><p><span><strong>Seeking Solace<strong>

Doofenshmirtz wasn't a bad father. He wasn't ugly, worthless or a complete failure either. Perry wished that he could find a way to tell him, but instead he settled for simply patting the back of his hand and hoping that his presence would be enough to make him feel a little bit better.

**Death**

Perry always went out of his way to save his idiot of a nemesis from mortal peril, which he couldn't quite understand. He was sure life would be easier without Doofenshmirtz, but maybe he didn't want that. But it had nothing to do with Perry caring about him, nothing at all.

**Speak**

It was never really an issue. Perry couldn't talk, Doofenshmirtz couldn't shut up. And despite their dysfunctional ways of interacting, they completely worked.

**Taunt**

As he collided heavily with the wall, Doofenshmirtz realized that it was probably a mistake to taunt Perry about the little mishap with Peter the Panda. It seemed that when Doofenshmirtz said his former nemesis was a lot cuter, the platypus didn't take it so well. He reminded himself to never press that button again, and then promptly passed out.

**Parents**

Perry had never met the two people that brought his nemesis into the world, but after a particularly disturbing back-story, he decided that he hated them anyway. Anyone that locked their kid outside at night didn't deserve to have the mother and father title, in his opinion.

**Blueprints**

They were right there, sitting on the coffee table, being used as a coaster. Even the most short-sighted person couldn't miss them. But Doofenshmirtz still crawled around the cage that Perry was trapped in, convinced that he had stolen his latest maniacal plan with intent of passing it off as his own.

**Water**

"...it's like drinking wet air. Don't you agree, Perry the Platypus?"

**Ink**

Perry crouched and pulled a marker pen from beneath his hat. Whilst Doofenshmirtz had his back turned, he grabbed the bottom of his coat and scribbled his name. If it worked when Roger did it to claim his mother as his own, why wouldn't it work now? Maybe if the idiot doctor belonged to someone, it would somehow vanquish a few of those horrible memories from his childhood and Perry could have a day off once in a while.

**Scared**

He shook his nemesis by the front of his coat, furry cheeks sodden. _Why_ wasn't he waking up? Perry chattered as loud as he could, bargaining with whoever could hear his prayers. When Doofenshmirtz drew in a shuddering breath and opened his eyes, Perry almost fainted with relief. It was a common occurrence, but it never failed to scare him out of his wits.

**Awkward**

"I don't mean to be nosy, Perry the Platypus, but where exactly did you just pull your hat from?"


	4. Chapter Four

**Title:** When We Didn't Get Along  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A collection of moments between Perry the Platypus and Heinz Doofenshmirtz.  
><strong>PairingWarnings:** Perryshmirtz! Mostly friendship, but with slight hints at more because I couldn't resist. A few swear words and innuendos.

* * *

><p><strong>When We Didn't Get Along<strong>

* * *

><p><span><strong>Pen and Paper<strong>

Perry blinked up at Doofenshmirtz, who tapped the table with one long finger. He picked up the fountain pen and cocked an eyebrow, before writing something on the notepad. Doofenshmirtz read it and blushed, frowning slightly. Perry had such a potty mouth, _geez_!

**Scent**

It was a mixture of aftershave, motor oil and some delicious candy. Perry would recognize it anywhere, and Monogram didn't even need to tell him where Doofenshmirtz had relocated his lair to. All he had to do was follow that irritating smell.

**Inator**

Perry spotted the button within a minute of being trapped, labelled 'self destruct' in bold, red letters. He really questioned the inclusion of such a thing, and came to the conclusion that whatever Doofenshmirtz invented, he wanted Perry to thwart him.

**Gun**

This was it. Years of dancing with death and escaping unharmed had finally came to an abrupt end. Perry shivered, backing against the wall as his nemesis cornered him, ray gun pointing directly at his temple. Their eyes locked for the last time, panicked brown meeting crazed ocean blue, a colour that Perry had grown all too accustomed to.

The platypus was extremely surprised to hear, "I can't do this," followed by the sound of the gun clattering to the laboratory floor.

**Belong**

He was evil, eccentric, and occasionally downright stupid. His schemes were barely thought out, his planning was ridiculous and he had no social skills to speak of. But, despite the millions of flaws he could think of, Heinz Doofenshmirtz was _his_ nemesis. And as far as Perry was concerned, by rights, the lunatic scientist belonged solely to him.

**Game**

"Okay, I spy with my little eye, something beginning with...P!"

"Krrr."

"Curse you, Perry the Platypus!"

**Tackle**

Sometimes it was to stop him from pressing a certain button, or from pulling a specific lever. Occasionally, it was because he had said something that had gotten him mad. But, if he was completely honest, half of the time that Perry spent tackling Doofenshmirtz to the ground was purely for his own amusement.

**Bandage**

Perry woke up abruptly from his shock-induced unconsciousness, blinking up at the figure above him. His arm twinged painfully and he winced. Doofenshmirtz tutted at him, dressing the deep gash with a reel of bandage.

"I can't believe you passed out! You scared me, Perry the Platypus!"

**Sick**

He would of protested strongly to Perry pushing him onto the sofa with gentle firmness, providing that he could speak. The platypus draped a duvet over him, saluted and disappeared through the front door. Doofenshmirtz smiled to himself and fell asleep almost instantly. His nemesis had made tonsillitis a little more bearable.

**Dance, Baby!**

It was a big change from the usual trapped-fight-defeated routine. But as strange as the situation was, Perry had never felt more alive as he did then, dancing along to a cheesy exercise video with Heinz Doofenshmirtz. It was strangely liberating.


	5. Chapter Five

**Title:** When We Didn't Get Along  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A collection of moments between Perry the Platypus and Heinz Doofenshmirtz.  
><strong>PairingWarnings:** Perryshmirtz, mostly friendship, but with slight hints at more because I couldn't resist. A few swear words and innuendos.

* * *

><p><strong>When We Didn't Get Along<strong>

* * *

><p><span><strong>Injury<strong>

He had been blown up, strangled by vicious plants and chased by giant robots. He had toppled off the balcony of his building countless times, almost been poisoned, been crushed by his own inventions and beaten to a pulp by a potted shrub. When it came to a rough conclusion, Perry couldn't help but respect Doofenshmirtz, he knew how to take a hit. The guy would make a pretty good agent, if he wasn't so damn accident prone.

**Breath**

The machine seemed to spiral out of control. Doofenshmirtz barely had time to blink before it burst into flames and swayed to one side, inches above Perry's head. It crashed to the ground a mere second after he leapt forwards, sending both himself and Perry flying out of the way. He didn't let out the deep breath he had been unconsciously holding until he felt Perry pulling him to his feet. Too close. He'd be having nightmares for _weeks_.

**Acute**

Perry didn't know half of what went on when his nemesis was a child, but he was almost certain that something else must of occurred, something that just pushed him completely over the edge. Maybe one day, Doofenshmirtz would trust him enough to tell him.

**Dirt**

"Would it kill you to wipe your feet, Perry the Platypus?"

**Relationship**

Perry just let Doofenshmirtz believe that he was fixing the 'Dull-And-Boring-Inator' because he had decided to change sides. But it was true when he said they made a good team, and he wasn't sure if it was a strange or completely normal thing that most of the time, they did act like an old married couple. But it suited him just fine.

**Musical**

Broadway, Perry could deal with. Folk songs and country pushed it a little, but he could take that too. But rock numbers were something that he just could not handle. Especially not when they ended with the image of Doofenshmirtz in a cropped shirt burned into his retinas.

**Life**

"I have it all planned out here!" Doofenshmirtz brandished a graph at Perry, who took it and read it intently, raising an eyebrow. "We'll battle every day, then when we're in our sixties, we'll both retire and spend most of our time either sleeping, playing chess or reminiscing about the past. Sound good to you?"

**Family**

"You aren't really a nemesis though, Perry the Platypus. I think of you as family."

Perry smiled. Yeah. Perry Flynn-Fletcher-Doofenshmirtz. That could work.

**Help**

It was unusual for Perry to not escape whatever trap he had set up for him, he was normally free within a few minutes. So, as the platypus helplessly rattled the bars of the cage, Doofenshmirtz gave it a sly kick so that door clicked and flew open.

**Camera Phone**

Vanessa let herself in, wandering down the hallway, her boots padding quietly on the purple carpet. Had her dad seriously forgotten that she was coming over? She sighed and pushed open the living room door, a smirk gracing her lips when she spotted Doofenshmirtz asleep on the sofa, one arm draped across Perry, who was sprawled on his chest. Vanessa was sure they would appreciate the several pictures that she took on her cell phone, and she was sure Monty Monogram would too.


	6. Chapter Six

**Title:** When We Didn't Get Along  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A collection of moments between Perry the Platypus and Heinz Doofenshmirtz.  
><strong>PairingWarnings:** Perryshmirtz! Mostly friendship, but with slight hints at more because I couldn't resist. A few swear words and innuendos.

* * *

><p><strong>When We Didn't Get Along<strong>

* * *

><p><span><strong>Best Friend<strong>

"It's clear to me now that my real best friend is Perry the Plat-_oof_!"

As much as he appreciated the sentiment, he still had a job to do. Perry rolled his eyes and jumped after Doofenshmirtz, the tiniest of smiles gracing his bill.

**Chained**

It was a long and sadistic queue of people, each one of them heading towards a certain doom. He couldn't see a way out of it. Agent P was finally out of clever ideas, and his biggest regret was that he wasn't chained to the evil scientist that he would never see again.

**Trick**

Doofenshmirtz obviously thought that his false facial hair and ponytail were successfully fooling his daughter, so Perry simply rolled his eyes and let him get on with it. The longer Doofenshmirtz was convinced, the longer the agent could watch him make a total moron of himself, which was fine by him.

**Unfunny**

"Perry the Platypus, WIRE you doing this to me? Get it? Wire?"

Perry heaved a sigh. Those jokes just got lousier by the day.

**Forget**

Doofenshmirtz just wasn't prepared to give up his nemesis. And if being chained up and hit with one of his own inventions meant that they could live their lives like every other day, then what the heck. He was willing to forget _everything_ he had learned about Perry. It was worth it in the long run.

**Remember**

"I keep having these _reee_-ally weird dreams, Perry the Platypus," Doofenshmirtz complained, after another restless night. "You're always in them, and you're a cyborg, and I have an eye-patch and I'm really _mean_. Not just _eee_-vil, I'm downright cruel! It's starting to freak me out! But it's just a dream, right?"

Perry nodded convincingly and patted Doofenshmirtz on the back of the hand. Just a dream.

**Devoted**

All he wanted to do was protect her, even if he was making a complete moron of himself. It reminded Perry that he and Doofenshmirtz weren't really that different. His love for Vanessa matched exactly how he felt about Phineas, Ferb and Candace.

**Familiar**

Fighting Perry felt old, but not the kind of old that became boring. It was like rediscovering an old song or finding long lost blueprints. It felt warm.

**Detail**

When they first met, he fought Doofenshmirtz because he disliked him. But, after a lot of thwarted schemes, Perry started to pay attention to the person that his nemesis was. A quirky, idiotic personality combined with eyes that changed shades with his mood and a strange German accent. And as soon as he memorized those details, Perry realised quickly that he was fighting a losing battle when he tried to carry on disliking his nemesis.

**Bipolar**

He had days that consisted of him plotting Perry's downfall from dawn until dusk, finishing with him feeling even more defeated than usual. And other days, he awaited the arrival of the agent with a happy smile and the exciting prospect of company bubbling in his chest. Either way, their meeting would be inevitable and Doofenshmirtz would be left in a heap on the ground, totally foiled.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Title:** When We Didn't Get Along  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A collection of moments in time between an insane inventor and his semi-aquatic nemesis.  
><strong>PairingWarnings:** Perryshmirtz! Mostly friendship, but with hints at more because I couldn't resist. A few swear words and innuendos.

* * *

><p><strong>When We Didn't Get Along<strong>

* * *

><p><span><strong>Shut Up<strong>

"...Perry the Platypus, I'm trying to think!"

**Argument**

Major Monogram held the phone away from his ear, wincing at the screeching Druelselstein voice that was assaulting his hearing. Judging by the fact he sounded close to tears, it seemed that Doofenshmirtz was extremely upset, and possibly slightly more insane than usual. Across from him, Agent P sat with his hat pulled over his eyes, teeth clenched in anger.

"Perry said _what_? What do you mean, you want a new nemesis?"

**Catch**

Mid-rant, Doofenshmirtz stepped backwards and tripped over his own foot. Almost automatically, Perry jumped forwards and held out his arms, catching the doctor in a tango-style dip. After a moment of awkward silence, in which Perry questioned what he had just done, Doofenshmirtz smirked playfully up at him.

"What, no flowers, Perry the Platypus?"

Needless to say, Doofenshmirtz crashed to the floor a millisecond later.

**Plant**

After being successfully knocked to the ground, he began to lose consciousness. Doofenshmirtz dizzily admitted to himself that as attached to Perry as he was, Planty put up just as good a fight as the platypus. But man, he didn't say a freaking word. Not even a cute little chatter.

**Control**

It had been a bad day, one that made him feel like crawling under his duvet and just crying. But despite Vanessa's rejection, his failed attempt at an invention and a sassy letter from Charlene, Doofenshmirtz could at least count on Perry to crash through his window in the dead of night, offering condolences and early hour soap opera re-runs.

**Walls**

With Perry crashing into the building every day and Norm's apparent objection to using doors correctly, it wasn't long before Doofenshmirtz started to receive discounts from his contractor.

**Fright**

It wasn't funny, not even in the slightest. It was actually rather childish, going out of the way to hide from someone then jumping out on them when they were least expecting it. Perry scowled and crossed his arms, a fierce blush spreading across his cheeks as Doofenshmirtz laughed so hard that tears streamed down his cheeks.

"Your face, Perry the Platypus!"

**Stability**

Nobody ever really stuck around to take an interest in what he did with his life, and although it was the wrong kind of attentiveness that Perry showed, Doofenshmirtz wouldn't have it any other way. It provided the permanence that he craved so much. After an abusive childhood, a broken marriage and countless unsuccessful careers weighing him down, Perry was that little piece of stability that he had spent half his life looking for.

**Conclusion**

Perry had came to two theories. Either Doofenshmirtz was completely in love with the sound of his own voice, or he actually thought that his nemesis was paying attention to him.

**Robot**

When Perry first heard Norm refer to Doofenshmirtz as 'dad', he had almost keeled over in silent laughter. But when Norm promptly turned around and called him 'mom', his amusement quickly turned to complete mortification. Maybe he needed to stop those movie nights with Heinz.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Title:** When We Didn't Get Along  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A collection of moments between Perry the Platypus and Heinz Doofenshmirtz.  
><strong>PairingWarnings:** Perryshmirtz! Mostly friendship, but with slight hints at more because I couldn't resist. A few swear words and innuendos.

* * *

><p><strong>When We Didn't Get Along<strong>

* * *

><p><span><strong>Count On Me<strong>

It didn't matter what situation he was in. He could be struggling to plan the perfect birthday party or dangling from the edge of his building by his fingertips, and Perry would be right there. _You know, he's gonna save me. That's what he does. _

**Torture**

When Perry was first assigned to Doofenshmirtz, he expected scalpels and needles and all kinds of physical torture. What he did not expect was for his nemesis' best form of torture to be tying him up and _talking_ him towards the very brink of insanity.

**Locked Out**

Doofenshmirtz was an idiot, but even Perry didn't think he was absent-minded enough to try and unlock his door with car keys, which was why they ended up sitting outside in the hall waiting for a locksmith, playing 'I Spy' instead of fighting.

**Locked In**

Somehow, during the usual punches and grappling, Doofenshmirtz had managed to throw Perry in a closet and jam it closed with a chair. Doofenshmirtz quickly left for a very long walk, because judging by the sounds from inside there, Perry had transformed into a Tasmanian Devil and he _wasn't_ happy.

**Insanity**

In Perry's opinion, you couldn't call your nemesis truly crazy until you had seen them dressed as a sock.

**Parent's Evening**

"So, you're Vanessa's father?"

"Yeah. And this is Perry."

"Oh. _Alright_. And this is...?"

"Oh, this is Norm," Doofenshmirtz rolled his eyes and sighed. "It's so hard to find a sitter these days!"

**Bin**

Perry knew as soon as he stepped through the doorway that Doofenshmirtz was mad at him. He prodded at the little felt mascot sitting in the waste-paper basket and sighed. Doofenshmirtz really did have too much time _and_ spare material on his hands.

**Homework**

"I don't know anything about Shakespeare, baby girl. Ask Perry the Platypus, he seems like he might be kinda poetic and deep."

**Glasses**

Perry thought Doofenshmirtz looked kind of smart in his new reading glasses. But then he blew himself up and burnt off his eyebrows and eyelashes, making Perry thoroughly retract that notion.

**Collide**

Whatever universe they were in, big or small, evil or good, the fates had decided that in every single one of them, Perry the Platypus would somehow manage to find and thwart Heinz Doofenshmirtz.


	9. Chapter Nine: Halloween Edition!

**Title:** When We Didn't Get Along  
><strong>Summary: <strong>A collection of mini moments in time between an insane inventor and his semi-aquatic nemesis.  
><strong>PairingsWarnings: **Perryshmirtz! Mostly friendship, but with hints at more because I couldn't resist. A few swear words and innuendos.

* * *

><p><strong>When We Didn't Get Along<strong>

_Halloween Edition!_

* * *

><p><span><strong>Fright Night<strong>

Horror movies with Heinz were always an adventure. Perry adored watching him jump at the slightest flicker of the screen, scream whenever the tiniest of things happened. But what Perry loved the most was when Heinz would eventually _beg_ him to stay the night, bribing him with all of the hot chocolate that he could possibly drink.

**Costume Contest**

Heinz suggested it the first time. Perry the second time. After two years, it simply became normal that they would turn up to Halloween events dressed as each other, and it never failed to render Major Monogram completely speechless.

**Seven Days**

Perry thought it was a pretty good idea, getting Carl to hiss down the phone to Heinz, insisting that he only had a week left to live. However, when he found that Heinz had locked himself in a supply closet out of sheer fright, Perry decided that it wasn't such a good prank after all.

**Spooked**

Perry was totally cool with holding hands when one of them was scared, but being used as a protective shield against a gigantic house spider was where he was forced to draw a line.

**Graveyard**

"I was only _joking_, Perry the Platypus!" Heinz looked sympathetic, crossing his legs underneath him. He eyed the lumpy duvet and hesitantly patted the bundle with a weak smile. "You can come out now. Do you really think that I'd live here if my apartment was built over an Indian burial ground? Come _on_! I was just trying to scare you!"

**Monster**

The word 'monster' meant, for most people, something unknown. It was green or purple, with countless eyes and tentacles. But for Heinz, it was a man. It stalked his nightmares, yelling the same words over and over again. _Bewegen Sie nicht!_ _Bewegen Sie nicht!_ _Bewegen Sie nicht!_

**Infected**

He could deal with the entire population of Danville becoming mindless zombies.

Hell, he could even deal with the entire _world_ becoming mindless zombies. As long as-

"_Not_ Perry the Platypus!"

"Vanessa, _NO_!"

**Terror**

Perry never thought he'd see the day that his nemesis actually made his palms sweat with fear, but something about the Doof zombies made him feel a little off balance. They were just so...unlike Heinz. And they were even _more_ annoying than the original copy.

**Bloody Mary**

"Okay, Perry the Platypus. You ready? Bloody Mary..."

"Krrr."

"Bloody Mary..."

"Krrr."

"Bloody-"

_Bang, bang bang!_

"IT'S MUFFIN TIME, SIR! ARE YOU IN THERE?"

"Norm you moron I... are you okay, Perry the Platypus? You're completely _white_!"

**Pumpkin**

"Look, Perry the Platypus! I carved you!" Heinz held up his awful attempt at pumpkin art, and Perry forced himself to smile. "Maybe I should become a professional carver. But I guess the work would be pretty slim, barring October."

* * *

><p><strong>Note: <strong>Happy (late) Halloween! How about _Night Of The Living __Pharmacists_? I think I have a new favourite episode!


End file.
